Frequently Asked Questions

When relationship pain comes up in someone’s life and they want answers on how to mange it, it is common for many to turn to books and/or workshops or free resources online, such as social media, podcasts, blogs and support groups. These are all great resources....and they can also have their limitations. When someone gets to a point where they realize they are still in a lot of pain and feeling really stuck trying to figure things out on their own, the next option is typically tends to include hiring a practitioner: either a therapist or a coach. However, it's important to note that taking the time to hire the right practitioner can make or break the results a person is seeking to gain. Hiring a coach allows you to have personalized support and guidance and unlike therapy (more on this in the next question), coaching is very goal and results driven so the focus is on working to create real change.

As stated above, when you are trying to decide who to hire, it depends entirely on what you need and want. The most important question to then ask is: is person you are looking to hire educated and competent in specific area you want help in? 

Therapy has its place for specific needs, but one of the reasons many are drawn to coaching is because coaching is results driven. Coaches, like therapists, are supportive, but one of the biggest differences is that coaches are very focused on your goals and desires so that you can move towards creating change.

I decided to study and become a Certified Relationship Coach so that I could not only become a specialist around the dynamics of relationships, but also because I know from experience that not everyone ends up creating the change they desire simply by participating in talk therapy. 

The short answer is no. I typically say this: if someone needs surgery, they most likely are not going to seek out a general doctor. Most want an expert in the type of surgery they need because they know a dedicated specialist will yield the best results. Do you notice how many general areas of “expertise” many practitioners, like some Life Coaches, claim to be competent in? While this is said in no way to knock others who offer coaching services, My Relationship Coaching is different than many because my solo focus and certification is around the aspects and challenges surrounding relationships. I am a specialist in my area of study. Your decision in hiring a practitioner goes back to you knowing what your specific needs and wants are. Maybe a generalist is a fit, but maybe you need a specialist who is the most competent in the area you are seeking the most guidance in.

Friends and family have their place for certain types of support. The downfall of turning to family members and friends is that their own personal biases, preconceived notions or underlying agendas can make their advice-giving problematic. In addition to unavoidable bias, the biggest reason remains that friends and family do not study relationships and human beings for a living. Thus, even when they are well-intentioned, their advice and opinions can often only further muddy the water and leave us feeling pressured or more confused or stuck. A skilled practitioner can help give you more educated guidance without the downfalls of advice from those in your own personal life.

Because therapy and coaching offer different things, therapy does have its place and can be a huge support in certain areas of life where coaching may not be (i.e  support around abuse, deeper trauma, addiction, and/or mental health issues). As such, it is not at all uncommon for clients to be utilizing the support of a therapist while working with a coach. In fact, it is encouraged. If the needs and wants you have in your life are being supported by another competent practitioner, that can only add to your growth and long-term success in coaching. 

Unlike therapy, coaching is not billable to insurance. 

Coaching is an investment. It is about making a commitment to influence and enrich each day of your life moving forward. Maybe there is a choice to be made between the value of going out to dinner twice a month verse investing in coaching. Those who commit to and invest in relationship coaching place fulfillment in their relational life as a higher value then other things.

 I’ll ask you to again ask yourself, what are really looking for? If you know that making progress around your relationship challenges and/or relationship growth is the focus of what you seek and you are looking for change and results, then you have come to the right practitioner! My Relationship Coaching is different than other coaching and therapy because my solo focus and certification is around relationships and the achievable steps that can be taken to face challenges and create more connection and fulfillment in our relational lives. 

There are no required duration of our coaching relationship, however, in order to work towards creating real change, there needs to be a frequency that allows for us to create the momentum and gain the forward progress necessary to achieve your goals. You can’t have huge gaps in your gym visits and expect to see your muscles change. On average, most clients that are committed to relationship coaching see me once a week. In order to stand for what is in the greatest service of our momentum, of you, your goals and the depth of our progress during each session, I ask that my clients commit to having a scheduled session once every 2 weeks at a minimum. I do have clients that now see me once a month and that frequency of sessions can be ok once a client is able to reach a transformative place that will come from having a greater frequency of sessions and accountability in the beginning of our work together. 

The question I believe you should be asking yourself here is how willing am I to create substantial change? The level of results achieved will be highly dependent upon how willing you are to take what we discuss in coaching and then apply it to your life. You can’t just watch the game from the stands anymore, you have to get on the court and play the game! Putting new things into practice can feel hard and uncomfortable and even messy at times, but those that want a good crop have to tend the farm. The people that get the most out of coaching are open to what they can learn and practice doing things differently.

Here is what I can guarantee. I can guarantee that you will feel seen and heard in our sessions. I guarantee that you will be able to uncover blind spots and gain more clarity about what you want relationally (you may be surprised to learn it’s not what you currently think you want/need). I guarantee you will glean new insights into your relationship with yourself and with others. As your coach, I guarantee that I will support you, challenge you and help keep you accountable so you can keep making strides forward. Last by not least, I guarantee that in our time together you will be able to learn tools needed to drastically transform the landscape of your relational life.